Where were you when you heard the news, when you realized that the world had lost its greatest
entertainer? I was in my living room, watching TV, shaking my head and wondering what life would be like without George Carlin.
That was a year ago. I just couldn’t believe the brilliant comedian was gone.
I had the same feeling when I heard that Michael Jackson had died, a feeling that the world had lost a talent it would never see again, at least not for another millennium, when someone develops a time machine.
Jackson was to my generation what Neil Armstrong was to the previous one. Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, but until Jackson came along, many of us had never seen the moonwalk.
He was no astronaut, of course, but nobody could rocket up the music charts like him. During his peak, he had more No. 1 singles than anyone else, more hits than the entire lineup of the Chicago Cubs.
He became known as the “King of Pop,” easily outshining all contenders for the title, even that Indian man who had set a world record for bursting balloons.
He gave us an album called "Thriller" –- and what a thrill it was, the best investment a music fan could make, aside from taking Madonna on a date.
His mega-hit “Beat it” soared to No. 1 on several charts around the world, so popular that Ayatollah Khomeini, concerned about the influence of American popular culture, instructed the youths of Iran to stop “beating it.”

data from a traveler's laptop or personal electronic storage device and keep it indefinitely. Coincidentally, the Department of Homeland Security has issued new guidelines for people entering America by air:
children. Kids are such a joy! I have three little ones myself and let me tell you, when I'm at work, I'm constantly looking at my watch, counting how many hours are left before the peace and calm ends. 

house
in New York City or getting all my teeth pulled. I thought I would just make the rules -- "Don't forget to tidy your room before going to bed" -- and my children would follow them -- "Yes, Dad, we'll do it right away. Would you like us to tidy your room too?"



have a gift receipt or know which store it came from, you might be able to return it. But if you don't, you have three options: (1) Donate it to a thrift store or charity; (2) Regift it to a friend or relative; or (3) Keep it in a closet and take it out whenever you need to swat a fly.
me last Christmas just didn’t cut
it. I don’t know where you picked up that lousy beard trimmer. I guess it was
silly of me to expect someone like you to know anything about beard
trimmers.

country. If
it’s Canadian dollars, you can throw a big party; if it’s American or
Australian dollars, you can pop some champagne; and if it’s Zimbabwean
dollars, you’d better get a hanky. 
