Even if you're married, you ought to read matrimonial ads. Not only are they entertaining, they may also
make you feel good about the person you married. Here are some actual excerpts from Indian matrimonial ads on the Internet:
His body is single too: “I live with my parents in parents owned house. My family status is upper middle class. … My face colour is light dark. I have muscular/single body.”
Don’t tell your husband: “I believe in simple living and high thinking. I am looking for a girl married unmarried no matters but should be simple and co-operative. If any body interested contact me.”
She’ll be your Shakespeare: “The world isn't really that big after all. Why then oh why are thee hiding from me? Are you not in ardent search of me as I am of you? Don't you think it's high time we lit up each other's lives with love? – after all, you – gazing at your P.C. this very moment underneath this same big starry blue sky & I – have been Heavenly made for each other.”
Don’t worry, she’s no career woman: “We parents are placing this profile for our daughter. … She has excelled in her academic and professional career as an engineer, yet she is not career oriented. She likes to focus on helping others towards better health and spiritual growth through yoga teachings.”
He’ll look after you well: “Very good in looking. Very enthusiastic. Music lover. Helping tendency. Good earning. ... I am looking for a fair homely educated girl. Employment – no bar. Should be a Hindu religion girl with ample belief in God.”
An English Expert: “I'm medium in built, fair and good looking. I'm very kind, helpfull, tolarative, understandable and foreseeking. I've passed my A/L in Science. … I've an excellent English knowledge.”
Girls and ladies welcome: “I am a tall handsome fair 29 year old guy, looking for a girl/lady with human values, loyalty, faithfulness, residing at UK, USA, Canada. Girls/women looking for a long honest relationship are welcomed.”
He’ll set you free: “What I want in a girl is outer and inner beauty. I want to give her freedom. I’m a free man, completely free, so I want her to be free, though she may swim in the love of my heart.”
He know his music: “I love to go hard in life. I love music and watching BBC and Punjabi songs and Janifer Lopaz songs.”
Excuse her, if you live in the East: “Physically, I would consider myself to be attractive, well-maintained and friendly. … I am looking for someone well-educated, mature, compassionate and residing in UK or US. I am well balanced in values, both eastern and western. Guys residing in India, Singapore and Malaysia, please excuse.”
She’s neither Aishwarya nor plain Jane: “I'm neither tall nor short, neither fat nor skinny, neither light nor dark. Let's put it this way, I may not look like Aishwarya Rai, but I know how to carry myself well – in a natural and attractive manner.”
She’ll mow the lawn: “This profile is for my daughter. Her qualification are Bsc., M.A, LLB and nowadays preparing for PCS-J mains. She is also good in doing all type of household work as well as outside work.”
She’ll give you lovable surprises: “I am looking for someone financially sound so that I do not need to work when it comes to raising and nurturing babies. I want my babies to grow in front of my eyes. I am a type of person who likes to give lovable surprises now and then. I want that my life partner love me so much that we forget any pains of our life by being in each other's arm. He should be able to forget his tiredness with my love and my loving smile.”
Applications are now being accepted: “I’m good looking, honest and religious. So I'm looking same or much more good qualities in my life partner. Anyone who is serious about this matter may apply with complete bio data.”
He values the fragrance: “Well, about myself, I'm a matured, but fun loving and caring person, basically an extrovert. Have a modern touch to my life, but still value the traditional fragrance of our culture. Very much naughty with friends and family. They all love me a lot.”
And they have online handles like, silly_me, dumbo, jumbo, smiley_face, tall_guy, looking_for_love and a whole lot of scary ones.
Posted by: Sowmya | October 11, 2007 at 12:22 PM
Yeah, Sowmya, I just saw one that was something like "Ineedahusband@yahoo.com."
Posted by: Melvin | October 11, 2007 at 01:32 PM